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You’re Not Rich

I know you think you are or you’ve been told you are, but you’re not rich. The problem with physicians thinking that they are rich is that they’ll go down the wrong path.

It’s like your kids, if they think they is stupid, they’ll never apply themselves. If they think they aren’t good at math they won’t develop their own style of learning new, hard topics.

Our patients, if they think they are doomed to be overweight or that it’s just their pesky TSH holding them back, they’ll never achieve the health they want.

If you, Dr. Money, think you’re rich, you’ll spend money you don’t have and feel bad for others who are poor. So, here is why doctors aren’t rich.

Time:Money Equation of Wealth

If you did a regression analysis (what?) of physician income and their “financial success” then you’d identify a group who spend an insane amount of time and money on a profession with very shitty (statistical term) returns.

Wealth is what really matters because none of my readers are stupid enough to think that the number of zeros in their bank account, much less paycheck, means anything. Wealth is the ratio of time:money you get to have to yourself.

In medicine, unfortunately, most of the time, to make more you have to work more. If it’s not working more it’s “worrying” more.

I want to spend my time on this earth doing meaningful things with my time. And I want an income that can allow me a certain level of comfort; not luxury.

Doctors Aren’t Rich

You know who is rich? The dude who own 60 fast-food restaurants. He clears $3 million a year and spends less and less time on the business as the portfolio grows. He’ll also have a ton of equity in form of business and real estate when he sells the business. Or his kids will inherit and and the generational wealth continues.

You know who is rich? The guy who owns 7 Chevy auto dealerships in Texas.

The CEO is rich who is making $14.5 M a year without bonuses.

The guy who owns a court stenography business is rich.

The guy who own a traffic security guard company is stupid rich.

See, it’s just that you are in the US, the country where everyone comes who has an angle on success. It’s like being at Olympics and looking around for a pickup game of basketball – you will get your ass handed to you. Only your dribbling is worse than your passing.

Living Rich When You’re Broke

Okay, you’re not broke either but look at all the new Camaros and Silverado Trucks out there, these are $50K cars owned by mostly those who make sub-$50K a year. Ouch.

The rich dude drives a $150K S-Class, yes. But they are also making $10M a year. Do the math.

When you make $500K a year and have a $150K fleet of cars at home for your teenager, you, and moms, you’re stretched pretty thin. Not to mention, you don’t got nobody servicing all those vehicles; that’s where the time factor comes in.

You’re Time Broke

When you’re rich you got a guy who’ll do your trees, another guy who’ll take care of your pets, another guy who’ll come pick up your car for servicing and leave a loaner for you.

You have a concierge doctor who’ll call you before you call him. Your taxes are done for you and your kids are dropped off at school so that you can be fully present when they are home.

I am starting at this crappy ANKER Bluetooth speaker and trying to figure out how to charge it because it uses a Micro USB which doesn’t plug into the other thingamagig – WTF!

I also have to regrout the kitchen tiles and redo the silicone around the bathtub. The plant on my desk, it needs watering, and I need to go do some grocery shopping because I’m out of food in the house.

Fuck chores! Okay, no, I’m kidding. There is something nice and zen about it. And I’m sorry I said you’re broke, I didn’t mean it. You’re not broke, but, you know, it’s easy to get confused.

Rich People Do Rich Shit

I mean, yeah, rich people also do dumb shit like pay hundreds of thousands of dollars for horses and horseback riding lessons for their niños. But they are also buying their kids tons of investments, a couple of homes, sending them to schools where the parents have ton of connections in the community. That’s rich shit that rich people do.

Not-so-rich-people force their kids doing tennis lessons they hate with kids they don’t know. The kid has to do well in school so that they can get an engineer, medical, or attorney job.

Rich people take the entire family along with their private Jeff to Israel and then off to the Bahamas before returning to their perfectly-taken-care-of-home while they were away. They come back full of hummus and perfectly tanned.

Rich people send their kids to universities overseas and encourage them to make connections. They bring them along on deal-making sessions because that’s how the parents got rich.

I’m not saying all rich people are doing things right, perhaps even the opposite is true. But I suspect that the majority of those who have earned their wealth are incredibly family oriented and dedicated to the success of their fetuses.

Living Poor In The US is Posh

I take the bus in Long Beach, don’t own a car, buy my clothes second hand, and don’t eat meat. I’m a fucking peasant. And if it wasn’t for my occasional saop baths I’d be hobo.

Regardless, I live like a kind here because I’m in the US. I get to enjoy insanely safe streets. A legal system that treats me fairly. Even the cheapest food here is safer than most things you might buy in less developed countries.

I can go to the library and use state of the art computers. I can totally free health insurance if I strategically lower my income. I can even get a free cell phone and have most of my utilities paid by the gov’t.

Now, I’m not saying you should poorify yourself. The point is that even if you live like a pauper in the US, assuming you don’t suffer from mental health or afflicted with the wrong skin color, you can enjoy an incredible lifestyle.

Living Poor Isn’t Sexy

If you’re not living rich, you gotta live mediocre or poor. If you’re a single dude like me and making $150/hour then you can live mediocre. But if you have mouths to feed and a whole household to manage and a career trajectory to maintain, yo’ ass is broke as a joke!

I mean it, you is poor, brother. I know you don’t think it because you’re getting biweekly $25k paychecks but you’re not keeping that. And you’re spending an absurd number of hours a week managing that doctor lifestyle.

K-Mart wasn’t successful even though it was pulling in $2B a year. In fact, it was losing more than it was making. The number of zeros don’t matter. You’ll have to decide for yourself what the rich life means to you.

Living the Rich Life

I don’t care what any rich person says, they are still tied to their lifestyle with many balls juggled in the air. They have tons of employees and gotta delegate constantly.

That’s one way to live the rich life. But another way to live rich is to cut the expenses, cut the overhead, cut back on work, spend more time with family and friends, and spend more time doing things that are important to you.

I mean, my poor mother must be beside herself that her good Persian son didn’t get hair implants for his balding head, didn’t buy a nice house with columns and a couple of lion statues out front in Beverly Hills, and isn’t driving a respectable Mercedes. The shame!

Yet, it’s a Monday and I just got back from having Ramen with my buddy. Took the bus back, in fact. I’m sitting in front of my laptop writing this article for people I love, listening to free house music, and drinking Ashwagandha tea. I’m not US rich but I’m rich by any other world standard.

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